A fighting pacifist.

I'm not actually a pacifist, by the way, as it has no pragmatic implications whatsoever. As so aptly pointed out by someone or other (probably Harris), if the world had adopted Ghandi's idea that the Jews should kill themselves before they could be killed, well... we'd all be dead. Pacifism is by far and a way the stupidest ideology prevalent in more liberal people at the moment, because of how nonsensically it would have to be applied to the most divergent of situations. It's an absolute where context is necessary. That's not what I want to talk about, however, and in fact I don't really want to talk about anything. I'm too fucking tired.

I'll just ramble about that awful fight you have to have when you're tired. You know, the one where you're clawing at the edges of consciousness, struggling to stay awake? The one where your eyelids are creeping inexorably closer to the hoods. The one where you physically don't think you can stay awake. That one is great. Not sure why, however, because it's stupid. You're just sitting there and your body is going, 'yeah, no, can't do this I'm afraid', and it makes no sense. It normally happens on days where you have no good reason to be tired. Take today, for instance: I slept for a good 9 hours last night (as befitting of someone of my age) and didn't get up until around 10.30 this morning. Since then I've just sort of ambled about. I would say running errands, but it would be a misnomer. There has been no running. At one point I think I stopped moving. It might be the sun, I guess. It has been unseasonably warm today (then again, 'unseasonably' implies warm: none of our 'falls' are warm). Not sure what I'm talking about, really. I think I'm just rambling. So there was that, and this was now. I was out in the garden reading God Is Not Great, and the slow and steady drift towards slumber ensnared me. Cernuous of head and horizontal of body (I can contort into some wonderfully lazy positions). I looked like the illusionist's trick whereby a person is prostrated between two chairs, and when they are both removed their body is still reticulated at the ridiculous angle - despite anyone's best attempts to curve them back into normality. That was me. On the chairs. With my legs in that awful position on the table. Ya know, the one that gives you pins and needles in like 8 seconds? What's up with the phrase 'pins and needles', any way? In no way does getting an inoculation, for example, feel like sitting in the lotus position. Nor does pricking your finger feel like sitting on your hand. Neither are particularly painful, but the are two distinct sensations.

Silly world.