Guantanamo Bay is providing more nourishment to the impoverished digesters of lunacy: The Senate has approved the governmental plan for ‘temporarily extraditing’ the inmates of the GB to the US for trial (I love this sentence, it’s so fabulous). This announcement comes about a week after the news that judges have ruled information pertaining to British detainee Binyam Mohamed should be disclosed publicly. Of course, the decision comes merely as a platform for excusing our pseudo-sanctioning of the detainment of Mr. Mohamed: Whilst he attempts to discredit the British intelligence services, the judges hope that the releasing of the paperwork will demonstrate how active Britain was in attempting to gain interviews with Mr. Mohamed. It’s perhaps the first step for Obama in clearing his route towards the full-closure of the detainment ‘camp’ (scheduled for January of next year) – although more interestingly, the bill does not allow for the retention of the prisoners on American soil after their trial. Richard Lister, a Washing correspondent, wrote: “The legislation does not allow those acquitted to stay in the US, and those convicted will not be able to serve their sentences in US prisons.”
From betrayal to Royal Mail: Yes, the Brits are struggling under the weight of undelivered mail, and the unions are getting their angst on at pledges to hire in scabs to cover the strike days. The strikes, are mainly because of concerns over job security when phase 4 of the ‘modernisation plan’ is rolled out. Now, because British people are probably reasonably aware of this story, I will only speak about the bit that I found particularly hilarious: David Cameron’s lashing out at Brown’s alleged “[lack of] courage and leadership”. Cameron goes on to say that since the shelving of plans to part-privatise the system, “union militancy has got worse”. Cameron seems to be capitulating further to the fates of Irony as each week passes; it’s truly sublime to witness a man implode through his own communicatory failings.
Onto lighter news: A driver has managed to break 15 laws in just over 10 minutes in Switzerland. The offences include: Speeding (160 km/h), driving on the hard shoulder, ignoring traffic lights, and failing to stop for police. When police finally managed to pull the man over, he failed a drugs test. Fabulous work, unnamed Swiss man!
Constitutional victories for the women of Kuwait! They’ve today (Wednesday) been granted rights to their own passports, without needing their husbands’ consent. The gulf state has been making good progress towards a gender equal country: Women became franchised in 2005, and were entitled to become MP’s in 2009. It just seems odd that they had not the power of individual travel, but the power to be in government.
The entomologists of the world are rejoicing (well, that’s utter rubbish, but I bet they’re interested) with the discovery of a new spider! The ‘orb web spider’ can spin a yarn of up to 1 metre in diameter – impressive, I feel. And this is a proper web too – geometrically and aesthetically delightful – none of that rubbish we get in the UK or the US: Where the spider just kind of limply strings some string across a path. Long as your arm, feeble as your little finger. The only downside to this recent discovery is that it does nothing to alleviate the problems spiders have been having ever since their initial finding: They’re so utterly disgusting no one cares about what kinds live near them, as long as they can’t kill you.
And finally: A woman who was told that she needed a performing artist’s license in order to be able to sing at her job – stacking shelves – has been celebrating the week after the decision was reversed. This story does throw up two interesting points though: Don’t wear an orange necklace if you’re tanned, and that if you work in a local shop which has customers, don’t play a radio; you could be fined thousands of pounds. Yes. That’s right. But don’t sing either. Or talk. Or breathe. God is levying money on any bodily function performed in public. You just read that. £3, please. Yes. I’m god.
From betrayal to Royal Mail: Yes, the Brits are struggling under the weight of undelivered mail, and the unions are getting their angst on at pledges to hire in scabs to cover the strike days. The strikes, are mainly because of concerns over job security when phase 4 of the ‘modernisation plan’ is rolled out. Now, because British people are probably reasonably aware of this story, I will only speak about the bit that I found particularly hilarious: David Cameron’s lashing out at Brown’s alleged “[lack of] courage and leadership”. Cameron goes on to say that since the shelving of plans to part-privatise the system, “union militancy has got worse”. Cameron seems to be capitulating further to the fates of Irony as each week passes; it’s truly sublime to witness a man implode through his own communicatory failings.
Onto lighter news: A driver has managed to break 15 laws in just over 10 minutes in Switzerland. The offences include: Speeding (160 km/h), driving on the hard shoulder, ignoring traffic lights, and failing to stop for police. When police finally managed to pull the man over, he failed a drugs test. Fabulous work, unnamed Swiss man!
Constitutional victories for the women of Kuwait! They’ve today (Wednesday) been granted rights to their own passports, without needing their husbands’ consent. The gulf state has been making good progress towards a gender equal country: Women became franchised in 2005, and were entitled to become MP’s in 2009. It just seems odd that they had not the power of individual travel, but the power to be in government.
The entomologists of the world are rejoicing (well, that’s utter rubbish, but I bet they’re interested) with the discovery of a new spider! The ‘orb web spider’ can spin a yarn of up to 1 metre in diameter – impressive, I feel. And this is a proper web too – geometrically and aesthetically delightful – none of that rubbish we get in the UK or the US: Where the spider just kind of limply strings some string across a path. Long as your arm, feeble as your little finger. The only downside to this recent discovery is that it does nothing to alleviate the problems spiders have been having ever since their initial finding: They’re so utterly disgusting no one cares about what kinds live near them, as long as they can’t kill you.
And finally: A woman who was told that she needed a performing artist’s license in order to be able to sing at her job – stacking shelves – has been celebrating the week after the decision was reversed. This story does throw up two interesting points though: Don’t wear an orange necklace if you’re tanned, and that if you work in a local shop which has customers, don’t play a radio; you could be fined thousands of pounds. Yes. That’s right. But don’t sing either. Or talk. Or breathe. God is levying money on any bodily function performed in public. You just read that. £3, please. Yes. I’m god.
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